If you ask the best and brightest of humanity, they'll tell you the hardest thing to do is ask for help. I'm could never be 'the best'. I'm certainly not the brightest. But my kid is my shiniest, brightest star and I want to be able to support her on my own.

They're all beautiful, all unique, and each has destiny to fulfill. I'm worried my daughter won't have a chance to fulfill hers as completely as I dream. I am focused on her mental health, and my soon to be ex-spouse is a toxic presence for her. 

We are bound, by my own decisions and misplaced trust, to an island fortress beyond my control. We're bound to a man who considers both honesty and fidelity beneath him. Who puts the health and safety of our household at risk by the same lack of integrity. The "power/control" wheel on domestic violence websites describes his actions perfectly. When I try to leave, he threatens to kill himself so I'll feel sorry for him. This is even when he is obviously dating other people and spending the night at their houses; gaslighting me about them as though I can't see with my very own eyes.

My daughter is neurodiverse, (adhd and autism) and deserves as much as any new mind a good example from which to frame her worldview. Her fatherly example covers his ears and turns away to ignore her if she asks too many questions or needs a kind word, or tenderness. Her feelings are dismissed and her playful side only causes him irritation and contempt. She deserves comfort and soothing hugs as much as any child, even if it needs to be on her terms. That disagrees with him, and so she receives none.

I don't want your money because I want to undo the mistake I made. I acknowledge that the worst decision I truly made was made over 14 years ago, when I got married, and I chose poorly. I trusted a narcissist instead of myself. But I can't save myself alone.

This is me beyond pride, beyond desire, beyond any personal earthly need except that which provides the best and brightest for my daughter. She cannot thrive in this pathological trap I chose, and I can't get out of it alone. 

I really need your help to pay for AAPC training that will allow me to support my daughter on my own. I've started a medical prerequisite course that will open up the chance sign up for the billing and coding certification classes that will launch me into a steady position that pays well enough for me to breathe more easily. The funds you provide will keep me from having to ask my soon to be ex husband for money as he expects me to beg and plead for money for something as important as a pap smear. 

I will never be able to thank you enough. I can only promise you that my daughter's future will be more solid, more stable, more happy than you could ever hope for such a small donation.

Humbly Yours,

C. T., of the Island Fortress