Marla Higgerson

Hel Mother, Son, and DaughteReturn to Oregon

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I’m not someone who normally asks for help, but today I’m putting my pride aside for someone who means the world to me. My daughter.

For the past five years, my daughter has been taking care of me because my ability to walk and get around is very limited. I live on a fixed income from Social Security, so financially there is very little I can do to help her. But she has never once made me feel like a burden. She simply stepped up, just like she has always done for everyone else.

My daughter is a nurse who has dedicated her career to caring for the elderly, especially those living with Alzheimer’s and dementia. She has spent years running assisted living and memory care communities, caring for residents, including those who have no family to visit them.

She has spent her life being someone else’s safe place, even when she didn’t have one of her own.

What many people don’t know is that my daughter has had a very difficult life. She survived a terrible domestic violence situation that left her with broken bones and painful memories no one should have to carry. Yet she continued to get up every day, work hard, raise her children, and care for me.

She finally decided she deserved a fresh start.

She saved her money and moved herself, her 11-year-old son, and me to Arizona to escape those memories, build a better life, and be closer to her oldest child.

She did everything right. She even transferred with the company she had been working for so she would have a stable job when we arrived.

Unfortunately, just a few months after moving, that company dissolved, new management took over, and the stability she had worked so hard for began falling apart.

In Oregon, she had spent years building a respected career in senior living. Here in Arizona, she doesn’t have those connections, and despite her experience and determination, finding stable employment has been incredibly difficult.

Now we are facing the possibility of losing the home we are renting.

As her mother, the hardest part is hearing her cry at night when she thinks nobody knows. Watching her feel like a failure when I know how much she has sacrificed breaks my heart.

My daughter is not a failure. She is a survivor, a hardworking nurse, a loving mother, and a daughter who has given so much of herself to others.

She has spent her life putting everyone else’s needs before her own. Now she needs someone to do the same for her.

So I’m asking for her.

I’m hoping to raise enough money to help my daughter, my grandson, and me return to Oregon and begin rebuilding our lives. Any funds raised will help cover moving and transportation costs, housing and rental deposits, vehicle expenses, and basic necessities such as food, utilities, and medications while my daughter works to find stable employment.

Living on Social Security, I cannot give her the financial help she desperately needs, but I can try to give her something else: a voice asking for kindness when she is too proud to ask for herself.

Any donation, no matter how small, will help with moving expenses and getting us settled back home. If you cannot donate, sharing our story would mean just as much.

She has taken care of me for five years. She has cared for countless residents and families throughout her career. Now, just once, I want to find a way to take care of her.

As a mother, there is nothing harder than watching your child struggle and not being able to make it better.

My daughter has had enough heartbreak, enough struggles, and enough nights crying herself to sleep.